Peter Journal #3

The next question we had was “How would I compare my commitment to Christ when I first believed to my commitment now?”

I honestly do not like questions like this.  It is so hard for me to answer.  I never did not believe.  I was raised in the faith and when I first heard of people who did not go to church or believe (3rd grade) I was shocked.  So, there was never a time in which I did not believe.  Did my believe grow stronger?  Yes.  So I guess that is where I place my answer.

My commitment before 1997 was changed drastically after I was “reawakened” to the Word by two outstanding teachers.  Since I was raised in the church, I had a pretty good idea that I knew most of the Bible.  That had to be the case when each Sunday School lesson was the exact same one as the year before and I got all the answers right since they were pretty much the same ones, too.  The sermons all began to sound the same.  I learned nothing new for years!!!!!!!!!  Just when I beginning to in a church we attended where Catherine was born, I was placed in the nursery during Sunday School and during worship.  I got no feeding whatsoever for over a year.  I got very discouraged.  Then I got two teachers that taught me that I knew nothing at all about the Word and what was really meant by Living!!!!!! Word.  That is when my life changed.  I couldn’t get enough.  Inside He began working on me in ways that did become apparent till years later, but He was working already.

The comparison?  At times I feel the passion for growing dim.  But I think it is more of the times that I’m in the desert and I’m growing through fire.  Because wehn I come out, I’m stronger than I was before and I yearn more than I did before.