Peter Journal #3
The next question we had was “How would I compare my commitment to Christ when I first believed to my commitment now?”
I honestly do not like questions like this. It is so hard for me to answer. I never did not believe. I was raised in the faith and when I first heard of people who did not go to church or believe (3rd grade) I was shocked. So, there was never a time in which I did not believe. Did my believe grow stronger? Yes. So I guess that is where I place my answer.
My commitment before 1997 was changed drastically after I was “reawakened” to the Word by two outstanding teachers. Since I was raised in the church, I had a pretty good idea that I knew most of the Bible. That had to be the case when each Sunday School lesson was the exact same one as the year before and I got all the answers right since they were pretty much the same ones, too. The sermons all began to sound the same. I learned nothing new for years!!!!!!!!! Just when I beginning to in a church we attended where Catherine was born, I was placed in the nursery during Sunday School and during worship. I got no feeding whatsoever for over a year. I got very discouraged. Then I got two teachers that taught me that I knew nothing at all about the Word and what was really meant by Living!!!!!! Word. That is when my life changed. I couldn’t get enough. Inside He began working on me in ways that did become apparent till years later, but He was working already.
The comparison? At times I feel the passion for growing dim. But I think it is more of the times that I’m in the desert and I’m growing through fire. Because wehn I come out, I’m stronger than I was before and I yearn more than I did before.